| Title | : | The Golden Raven (All for the Game, #5) |
| Author | : | |
| Rating | : | |
| ISBN | : | - |
| Format Type | : | ebook |
| Number of Pages | : | 484 |
| Publication | : | First published February 22, 2025 |
Jeremy Knox is no stranger to damage control, but his last season on an Exy court is off to a disastrous start. The relentless crusade against his newest teammate threatens the haven he and his friends have worked so hard to build. He promised Jean a fun senior year, but tragedy and ugly truths make every step forward an uphill fight.
Jean Moreau promised the USC Trojans a championship trophy, and he intends to deliver. Granted, it would be significantly easier if they’d slide off their high horses and throw a few elbows on the court. Their steadfast refusal to do things his way is nearly as aggravating as their unwanted affection, but maybe they’re not the ones that need to change.
With so many ready to drag him down, how can he learn to fly?
The Golden Raven (All for the Game, #5) Reviews
-
4.5/5
The review contains spoilers!
And what if I say that Jeremy and Jean are my absolute favorites in the whole series and I would die for them? I didn’t think it was physically possible to love these two more, but I’m afraid I was wrong—these two are everything to me. The fact that it is the second book and we have only one left is making me bawl, but when I think that JereJean’s story was supposed to be one book at the beginning, as I remember (though I might be wrong), it is a little reassuring. But anyway, this book was yet another absolutely heartbreaking, depressing, and tragic read from Nora Sakavic, yet it made my life so much better.
I know it might sound weird, but I’m just so happy and glad that it was Nora Sakavic who came up with this story and these characters because the path she chose for Jean could not be more perfect. I already mentioned this in my last review, but there truly couldn’t have been a better place for Jean to end up. Trojan’s team, its players, coaches—especially Coach Rhemann—and, of course, Cat, Laila, and Jeremy are the best things that could have ever happened to him. The number of times I was smiling and crying from happiness because of these people is, I would say, pretty huge. It just makes me so so so damn happy to see Jean slowly healing, which is happening in large part because of them. I know he still has a long journey ahead of him, but his progress in this book was already significant.“I like pink,” Cat said. “Laila’s is purple. What about you?” Jean frowned as he thought it over, […]
“Brown.”
[…]
Brown like the soil in Rhemann’s garden, or the sand where the tide washed ashore, or the dirt roads Cat had led him down time and again. Brown like the gaze that sought Jean out in every room, but that last thought wasn’t one he could linger on."
“No. I will not ride that thing. I am going to take the stairs.”
“We’ll meet you up there,” Jeremy told the girls.
Laila caught hold of Cat’s sleeve, and the girls exchanged a long look. Cat peeled her heels off and hooked the straps over her fingers. “Which way is the stairwell?” she asked. As soon as Jean gestured, she set off with a cheery, “Race you to the top!”
They are such a family that I’m bawling. It’s those small things, man, those small things"A cool evening breeze. Rainbows. Open roads. Friends. Fireworks. After a beat he added a tentative, Coach, but that was so repulsive he had to reject"
I love how he was slowly adding more things to his list. I can’t wait to see him certainly add Coach Rhemann, the dog (yes, finally the dog, which is the perfect addition to their found family), and—I really hope—Jeremy (boyfriend) in the third book.
Moving on to Jeremy Knox (hopefully Moreau one day, as this man wants to change his surname, and Jeremy Moreau sounds perfect), what can I say about a walking perfection? I just love this sunshine captain so much. We finally got so many answers about his past, his awful family, and the tragedy that occurred at the event he had stopped attending—until now. Jeremy is really one of those characters who, despite a painful past and heartbreaking experiences, never lose their kindness. That’s one of the many reasons why he is truly the best partner Jean could ever have. Nora cooked when she decided these two were going to be together (there’s still one more book, but THEY WILL) because Jean needs someone who is a walking ray of sunshine and will help brighten his life.“No one will take you seriously if you learn French with a southern accent.”
“Does that really matter?” Jeremy asked, studying Jean with a stare that felt prying. “I’m not learning French for anyone but you.”
Jeremy THE MAN THAT YOU ARE."Jean tapped idly at Jeremy’s wrist. Jeremy glanced down, curious, but didn’t get a chance to ask. Jean’s lips grazed his cheekbone as Jean turned his head, and every coherent thought Jeremy had crumbled to dust. Jean had to feel Jeremy’s pulse kick up beneath his thumb, but all he said was, “But I’d forgotten—I do not know them in English.”
“Fireworks,” Jeremy said.
“Fireworks,” Jean echoed. He tipped his head back to study the sky once more, and maybe Jeremy imagined his, “This is good, too.”
"You deserve better than that.” That word again; Jean wanted to claw it from Jeremy’s tongue. He grabbed Jeremy’s chin to force his head up.
“Fuck what I deserve. What about what I want?”
We had some really, and I mean it, truly great (read: I was blushing like crazy) moments between those two. I already can’t wait for the ao3 fics.
There was a moment when I considered rating this book slightly lower—by 0.25, to be exact—but the final chapters made me smile so much that I just couldn’t do it. I’m already dying to read the next book, but I’ll try to be delusional and pretend it’s not the last one because I want to live a happier life.
────────
JereJean kiss will heal me (I literally won't taste happiness again until I read this masterpiece)
update: THREE BOOKS FOR JEREJEAN YESSSSSSSSSSS OMGGGGGG MY LIFE SUDDENLY GOT BETTER -
3rd re-read and I have one thought: Jeremy Knox, I love you to bits.
_________________
Hey, how do I rate this 6 stars?
No, scratch that, this book deserves at least 10 stars. AT LEAST.
I don’t know where to start, you guys.
This book has WRECKED me, body and soul: I managed to inhale nearly 500 pages in just over 24 hours, no sleep to be had at all, and then I proceeded to re-read it all over again (and yeah, again, no sleep whatsoever: my brain has been officially taken over by Jean and Jeremy).
I’m not sure how I’m meant to wait for book three, except by re-reading it again (and again; and also by re-reading the previous book and the AFTG trilogy just for good measure) and by crying over how perfect this freaking sequel is. I think it might be my favourite Nora novel EVER (or at least, it’s on the same level of “The King’s Men”).
I fell in love with Jean and Jeremy all over again in “The Golden Raven”: I didn’t think it was possible to love them more than I already did, but yeah. I’m so obsessed with them it’s not even funny anymore: somebody PLEASE SEDATE ME.
This book begins soon after the events of book one (let me refresh your memory: we'd just left Neil causing havoc in LA and Jean breaking my heart all over again --> Friends. ) and it’s a whole goddamn ride from start to finish. An emotional, gut-punching, soul-wrecking one at that, packed with revelations, shocking twists and surprises, heart-breaking discoveries and surprisingly (but actually not; this is Nora we’ll talking about) quite a lot of healing too (at least, for our Jean; Jeremy’s another story BUT WE’LL GET TO THAT).
The Trojans (yes; every single one of them) stole the scene right from the start. When I started TSC, I was worried I wouldn’t be able to love a team as much as I do the Foxes, but I shouldn’t have doubted Nora. TGR confirms what I already knew: I’d die for every single one of the Trojans. They’re the absolute best. From Jeremy and Jean (but we’ll get there) to Laila and Cat (I’ll talk about them in a bit) and Cody (they’re my favourite, I think <3) and Ananya and Xavier and Patrick, and all of the newer teammates we get to meet properly (I’D LAY MY LIFE DOWN FOR DEREK AND DERRICK?????? I LOVE THEM). They brought so much light and so much joy, and I’ve never cackled this much in my life whilst reading. Nora’s writing has always been hilarious (when it’s not being heart-wrenching, of course) but she surpassed herself here.
Laila and Cat stole the show EVEN MORE here: I didn’t think it was possible to love them more, but I DID. Cat’s an icon (I LOVE HER AND JEAN’S BOND SO MUCH) and Laila? What a delight Laila was here. She’s always been a bit more of a mystery than Cat, but we get so much Laila content here! She’s so clever and steadfast, and Also: Laila and Jeremy’s bond? I cried. Big, fat, ugly tears. My babies.
Of course, I also LOVED seeing some old faces too. No spoilers, but you’re in for a treat (and also, quite possibly, you’ll need to bill Nora for extra therapy sessions, because WHEW). The twists kept on coming, guys!
Also:
And yeah, Jean and Jeremy.
They were the beating heart of this book: their slow-burn romance (yes, ‘cause it’s gonna be jerejean guys!!!!!!!!!!) had me gnawing on my fingers, squealing in my pillow, blushing and also screaming because I cannot deal with how PERFECT they are for one another.
Again, I can’t delve to deep because SPOILERS, but oh my god. They make me seriously unwell. The parallels, the chin grabs, the gentle touches, the “look at me” and “you are my partner”? The fact that they’re so down bad for one another they cannot bear to look at each other too long? The jealousy and the protectiveness? UGH MY HEART.
Individually, they both went through a lot.
I think, I THINK, Jean’s slowly starting to realize that what he went through at the Nest was monstrous: he’s slowly starting to heal and slowly starting to trust that the Trojans are his family, and that they would lay down their lives for him, no questions asked. Seeing him blossom throughout the book was a joy (okay, yes; of course, there were setbacks and we’re still missing a book). He obviously still broke my heart to bits (), but I think he’s finally starting to see what he’s worth, at last. That what he deserves, what he wants (*wink wink*) IS valid.
Also, I’ve never had more goosebumps from an Exy match in the whole 10 years I’ve been a fan of this series. It was glorious. I can’t wait for more Exy in the upcoming book.
And Jeremy.
Jeremy, Jeremy, Jeremy.
I don’t know where to start. I’ve wanted a Jeremy backstory since the very first time we got to be in his head, all sunny and smiley and avoidant. I got my wish, BUT AT WHAT COST? I don’t want to spoil too much, and I’ll tag them when I do, but god. My heart.
SOME MINOR SPOILERS AHEAD -->
His chapters filled me with so much dread and anguish. He’s such a complex character, and obviously his life doesn’t touch Neil or Jean’s levels of crazy mafia shenanigans, but god. He’s so lonely and so stuck and so desperately needs somebody to whisk him away from his godawful family. He reminded me so much of Neil in the AFTG trilogy at times, in the sense that both of them are practiced liars and both of them have no way out. Jean’s chapters in a way were easier to stomach.
Okay, that’s enough Jeremy Knox for one review: I could go on and on and on though. He’s officially my top favourite AFTG character alongside Neil, and I can’t thank Nora enough for giving him the backstory and the character presence he so deserves. I adore him to absolute bits.
I loved reading this book so, so, so much. It gave me so much joy I really, desperately needed, and I cannot wait to get my grabby, greedy hands on book three. I’m so glad Nora decided to come back and give Jean his story and his (hopefully upcoming) happy ending. I’m glad she decided to keep writing, despite how toxic this fandom can (very often) be. I’m just so grateful we’re getting Jean and Jeremy’s story.
Also,
TWs/CWs:
------------
Pre-reading:
I WOULD SELL MY SOUL FOR THIS BOOK
update: THREE BOOKS YES YES YES!!!!!!!! This has made my year 😭 (p.s. we better get the Jeremy Knox trauma backstory pls!!!!! 👋🏻🩷) -
I've already talked about how much Nora's writing improved between Neil's trilogy and this one but it's so important to me that I say it again because it shows a lot more in this book. Even with all the heavy stuff going on around them, Nora still managed to make this book focus mostly on Jean as a character and how he was adjusting and healing rather than on the plot. It makes the story feel like it's Jean's and also Jeremy's and I loved that.
It's safe to say that I laughed twice as much as I teared up. Jean was so witty and unserious, I fell in love with him every single page. I adored Jeremy and loved getting to see more of his story and character. Reading Cat and Laila together, seeing Cat and Jean become so close made me the happiest. I have also become enamored with Cody and Xavier, can't wait to read more of them.
I appreciated (read: screamed my fucking lungs out) the tension and electrically charged moments between Jeremy and Jean that were sprinkled within the pages of them being genuine friends and choosing each other. Ugh I'm sooooooo obsessed with them. I can NOT wait until the last book is out.
As someone who did not care much for the first 3 books or for andreil as a couple or as individual characters, it is quite interesting how crazy and intense I am about jeremy and jean. I love them with my whole soul. -
god damn nora, why oh WHY can you not give us any smooches? i'm suffering over here.
the ending was cute as fuck tho.
don't mind me, gonna hibernate until book 3 -
GUYS WE ONLY HAVE A MONTH LEFT!!!!!!!!! 😭😭 JEREJEAN JEREJEAN MY BABIES!!!! 🥺🥺♥️♥️ I am going feral already I NEED this book!!! 🙏🏼🙏🏼
-
actual rating: 4.5 stars
-
Don’t get me wrong, this book is still stacked with trauma and angst but it’s also outweighed by every soft, simple moment Jean has. He’s healing!! And it’s done in such a nice way, just inches at a time, stepping into the light. I love him. During Jermey’s perspective while he’s studying Jean you can really tell that underneath all his scarred, protective layers he is a good person with a good beating heart. Ahhhhhhh, he would’ve turned out so differently if it weren’t for Edgar Allan. But it’s ok!! He’s getting better. Now Jermey has to follow him because he’s got his own shit to figure out. In my opinion, I actually liked the choice to have him sleeping around. I think it makes sense with his family and everything. It’s like a sense of rebellion, a sense of freedom to ease away from all of his muddled emotions and pain, just for a moment. I also liked getting a more solid look into how Jermey’s family runs, their rank, and their relationship. I thought the drama was done in a way where it didn’t outweigh the rest of the story but still played its part. Cat and Laila remain to be some of my favorites, they are both so sweet!!! They take care of Jean and each other. And they always figure out how to tie frazzled string back into something neat, not perfect, but neat. Also, I love to see Neil still being a Neil during the interview clips, that was awesome. The ending of this book has my heart!!! I need the next one badlyyy.
-
I finished this too quickly. I honestly screamed a little when I turned the last page and realised I was finished 🥲
I both feel like a lot happened, but also not a lot happened.
I love the Trojans. I love Coach Rhemann. Most importantly I love Jean’s growth.
I can’t believe Nora ever thought she’d finish this series in two books. I don’t even know how she’ll fit everything into one final book. Four books is clearly the only good answer here 😌 -
This was an emotional roller coaster but in a sense where I was freefalling the whole time.
Also, I really want to read some fanfics where Andrew and Jean are bros, pals, or at least FRIENDLY, so....... If you have some PLEASE share the link in the comments and I'll love ya forever! Byyyyye <3
Pre-read review:
I am going feral already
UPD:
GUYS WE ARE GETTING A TRILOGY SOMEONE SEDATE ME
UPD2: Nora said on twitter that it's more then 150k words. I wonder if at least two of those word are said by Andrew......... -
can’t believe i got to be the librarian to update this book with its official title, THE HONOUR 😭
-
Decided to keep my original excited rambling while anticipating the release of the book. I've never been this impatient and excited about a book.
Book just came out yesterday, and I'm already screaming because I have to wait for the next one. Jean, what are you doing to me, baby?
Jean is definitely not made for the life he was given. He's such a sweetheart, and it's so endearing he keeps slipping up with the facts about his life before Trojans, giving them crumbs here and there, more than enough to paint a picture. He tries so hard to be moody and above it all, but he might be more approachable as a character than Neil, Andrew, and even Kevin. I really hope Trojan re-ignite his love for Exy, and make him remember the small joys of life. Which is just perfect with Jaberwocky there (not spoiling anything, you have to get to the end of the book to figure it out).
Jeremy seems more complicated the more we find out about him. At the beginning, he comes across as incredibly positive and maybe like he wouldn't be able to help Jean at all as their lives are so different. Don't get me wrong, no matter how sad his life is, and how controlling his family is, he still might not fully empathise with Jean as that was such a unique situation. HOWEVER, I think him, and Cat and Laila, and all the other Trojans are so good for him. They might be the perfect fit, after all.
The way all the Trojans stood behind Jean united, even as the truth about his family came out- I'm not going to lie, I almost started to cry as I thought there could have been some doubts around the team. But they realised at this point Jean has been so misrepresented in the media he could never be the person they make him out to be. Speaking of which, that interview with Jean and Kevin. Oh my god, I can understand how uncomfortable that was for him and such a surprise they weren't the only French speakers there (awkward situation, at least they didn't mention anything about Moriyamas).
I love how Jean is not so morbid in this book, he's finally allowing himself to heal and is actively taking steps to get better. I know
Nora Sakavic seems to thrive on slow-burn romance (we waited so long for Andrew and Neil I was about to hurl my Kindle across the room) but if you were like me and hoped it might go a bit faster this time around, you're in for a disappointment.
Nora, please don't make us wait long for the next one. I thought I might die when the release date kept changing, and if anyone knows how to become a Beta reader for the next book, I'll give you anything you want. Literally anything. I'm not lying when I said I stayed up until five in the morning reading this book, I genuinely couldn't put it down. I was so worked up because PEOPLE KEPT INTERRUPTING ME. I swear I'll take a holiday when the next one gets out (provided I have enough of a warning to book it) and just barricade myself somewhere where no one can bother me.
Edit 2: THE DATE HAS BEEN SET FOR 22. FEB!!! Might still change, but it's something to look forward to, I can't wait!
Edit 1: We're getting another trilogy yay! Originally, this book was supposed to have been released in December of this year but it was pushed a little bit (understandably, though devastatingly) and book 3 is planned for sometime next year (hope this is still feasible so I don't have to wait until 2026). Can you believe I bought the original trilogy as a kindle years ago but forgot about it? I went through my kindle library at the beginning of the year and realised it's there and I need to read it. I have re-read it two times since then (second time just now as I'm sad I won't get to read this one in December). Knowing me, I'll re-read it again before this one comes out. Even for a girl who loves to come back and re-read her favourites, I've become surprisingly obsessed with this series.
Anyone else going to obsessively check the publication date, put it in their calendar and pre-order the book?? Because I will, I need it now! -
I adore you Jean Moreau, even if you break my heart, you bastard.
Every single soft Jean moment in this was my favourite and I'm mainly just excited to see him continue that healing journey.
So okay, I liked this significantly more than The Sunshine Court. In TSC I couldnt escape this sense of glee that the book took in heaping trauma upon trauma on Jean, to the point that it just started to feel excessive and bordering on trauma porn. But this book seemed to have taken that same glee and redirected it's energies on seeing Jean start to heal and process what he has been through and was conditioned to believe.
Honestly, the thing that haunts me the most, is that seeing where Jean is now, how long would he have realistically lasted in the Nest if he hadn't gotten out when he did?
I found that I didn't resonate with Jeremy's character arc as much through this book and that I got over the toxic family dynamics pretty quickly. I'm also intrigued by the choice to have him sleeping around with other people so often. I'm not sure yet how necessary that felt. I know that Nora will bring the climax of that slow burn together in a way that has us biting at the bars of our cages in the third book but ATM it's hard to see it cause both boys just have such a long way to go before that's a feasible step in their dynamic.
The cameos by Kevin and Andrew were enjoyable although I missed Neil being a gremlin (I don't think anything will hit the way the first trilogy and meeting Neil did though).
I think ultimately, this book is for the AFTG fans and that is the only audience it cares about. If you are looking for a literary masterpiece this probably isn't the book. If you are looking for more time with your favourite ragtag ground of trauma bound college athletes then you'll have a good time here.
4.5 stars for me ✨🥰 -
First Read March 2025: call me Wymack the way I think these people should never participate in interviews ever again, like oh my god.
I’m not exaggerating when I say this is one of the best books I’ve read in quite some time. I went into it with some reservations but it honestly blew my expectations completely out of the water. I need book three now
~~~
I just finished my reread of tsc; how tf is this book supposed to be sadder than that?
~~~
Update 4: Possible unpopular opinion here but the more I look at the cover the more I feel like I understand it.
~~~
Update 3: Releasing this book on Kevin’s birthday is diabolical.
~~~
Update 2: Longer than TKM AND sadder than TSC…oh they’re really going to go through it, aren’t they?
On top of finding out wtf is going on with Jeremy, I fear we’re going to find out exactly how requited Jean’s feelings for Kevin were…
~~~
Update 1: I'm really happy Nora confirmed that this will be a trilogy. I think that's the only thing that really makes sense, given how much ground she seems to need to cover based on what she's written thus far.
~~~
TSC 2: What The Fuck Is Going On With Jeremy Knox? -
“fuck what i deserve. what about what i want?”
cried so hard i started dry heaving. i close my eyes and see peaches and daffodils and fireworks and blood and violence and agony and despair and atrocities and torment. i’m a hollow shell of my former self. i don’t think i’ll ever experience joy ever again. -
I haven't read the sunshine court yet but this book is a NEED 🙏🏼
-
Perfect perfect perfect.
-
Alright let’s be honest did anyone actually think this would be anything less than perfect? I’ve included an itemized list of things I loved with absolutely no context or reasoning, enjoy:
- The general vibes Kevin brought to the function
- The nickname Queen
- A certain photo of Jermey
- The tragedy of Jeremy being born too soon for Duolingo, he would have ate that shit up
- Jean being a very polite bisexual
- Fireworks
- Hair brushing
- Ceramics class
- Little bro
- I am perfect court I can’t be wrong about exy
- Jermey finally being honest
- Who did this to you moment
- Forehead kisses
- Have a winning day
- Jean is ~actually~ like really good exy
- Coach Rhemann in one of the very best scenes I’ve ever seen in literature
- Fathers
- Jeremy finding Neil’s smile uncomfortable
- Andrew being a guard dog
- Jabberwocky
- Everyone rooting for Jean’s success so hard it hurts -
˗ˏˋ 5 ★ ˎˊ˗
am i supposed to be normal about this?? this was everything i could have hoped for. more, even. nora’s writing style has only improved since the original trilogy, immersing the reader so well in the plights of jean and jeremy. we got angst and healing and backstory reveals, plus kandreil n other fox cameos!! the found family aspect in this one made my heart soar; all the trojans are so precious, especially tanner and the other freshmen backliners 🐥 i can’t believe i have to wait another year for the conclusion i’m unwell -
The way this took over my entire life for the last two days. I love Jean with my whole chest.
THINGS THAT MADE ME DIE [AFFECTIONATE]:
- You’re my partner and I’ll throw your awful brother through a car windscreen if I want to.
- When their fave colours are the same shade as the other person’s eyes.
- Rex the Dog 🤝 Jean
- [touches bruises on neck] “Give me the name of the person who did this to you.”
- Every time Jean grabbed Jeremy’s chin.
- Kevin sending a postcard.
- Neil getting interviewed. Always a banger.
- Cat and Laila. My queens.
- Every time Jean sassed anyone.
- IM ONLY LEARNING FRENCH FOR YOU.
- “Fathers”.
4.75⭐️ No 🌶️ -
nearly 500 pages later and no jerejean kiss is actually a crime.
5 stars <3
rtc if i ever well myself (impossible.)
✎﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏
original prereview:
SHUT UP.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MERRY MF CHRISTMAS HAPPY NEW YEAR HOLY FUCKING SHITT WE'RE GETTING ANOTHER BOOKKKKKK
I AM ABOUT TO BE THE MOST FUCKING INSUFFERABLE PERSON ALIVE WHEN THIS COMES OUT KLDSJFLSDKFJLSDKFJSDLK
THIS ACTUALLY JUST MADE MY WHOLE YEAR AND I CAN NOW DIE HAPPY BYE.
nora sakavic is actually a queen and i now stan her for life. -
welcome back literature
-
wanted to cry when i finished this because the idea of waiting for the next book sounded so depressing
-
hard to find the words. the foxes have felt like family to me for years, but i warmed up to the trojans right alongside jean and now i don't think i could ever part with this team.
90% of this book hurt to read, honestly. i've spent the last two days crying when i'm reading, and zoning out when i'm not. there's so much pain on these pages, but every second is worth it.
jean moreau, i love you. kevin day, i love you. god. jeremy. neil. cat. laila. everyone. the foxes. the trojans. barkbark. i love you. the next book can't come soon enough. -
wdym its OVER hello???
----------
yall have no idea how excited i am
oceanofpdf literally take anything u want from me i love u so much -
THIS COVER IS SO UGLY I SCREAMED
i yearn to be freed from the shackles of this series. i do. truly!!! you... hey you have to believe me!!!! um... -
✰ 4.25 stars ✰
“How Jean’s kind heart had survived a place like Evermore, Jeremy wasn’t sure. It was bruised and bleeding, but it wasn’t broken. Jeremy wasn’t sure if that ache in his chest was pride or grief. Whatever it was, it was hard to breathe around.”
There were plenty other moving, inspiring, heartwarming, visceral, heart-wrenching, beautiful, quotes I could have chosen as my opener. But, the moment I read this, I knew that there was no other quote that perfectly captured the range of emotions I felt while reading The Golden Raven - an emotional rollercoaster Nora Sakavic once again took me on. 🙂↕️🙂↕️ I was bruised, raw, gripped, traumatized, shattered, rebuilt, - so proud, so broken, so overwhelmed, so heartbroken, so moved, so grateful, so difficult to breathe at times for the ride she took us on as we were privy to the story of Jean and Jeremy. 😔
And I would do it all over again. 💯
She makes it difficult to put into words how much she makes us feel for her characters; how we are so entwined in their dynamics that it feels like we're literally sitting on the edge of our seats, the shock factor on high, because every action, every reveal is something else that we'll harness and dissect because we care so much - like something is squeezing your heart. And I cared. ❤️🩹❤️🩹 As much as the shadow of whatever was happening is a literal parallel to Neil's journey that forever changed my life, I cannot deny that after reading it just once - I was in a stupor. The angst, the humor, the friendships, the discoveries, the twists, the hurt, the comfort. 🤌🏻🤌🏻 Stunned and unable to think about reading something else, because I was not ready to move on yet from what I had just learned - witnessed - felt - believed - held in my arms for just a few hours - immersed in a beautiful story that has me already counting down the days to have the sequel in my hands again. 🙏🏻🙏🏻
“I deserve to get better.”
Yes, you do!! 😭😭😤😤 Jean is on the path of healing. To learn more details about his past, to watch him fight within himself about how much he's willing to give and take, to see him allow himself to have and care for others, to just witness his shattered soul, and then just find the little moments that comforts his precious person, his own form of caring, despite his harsh-sounding remarks, lies a tender and gentle soul that deserves the best of life for he's been deprive of it for so long - forced to keep everything in his heart silent - refused to even embrace the chance to be vulnerable, open, and honest, to experience the small wonders and embrace the moments stolen from him - deprived of him. 🥺 If you care enough for him, I don't need to share the details of every instance where my heart swelled with joy, or hurt with pain - you'll feel for his path on self-discovery too. Seeing him learn to trust, to change, to let go of the Ravens ways, to grasp onto this chance to be different - hopeful for better - a promise of happiness. Friends and teammates and Fathers who see his potential, care enough for his well-being... 🤧🫂💟
“I told you all summer I want you to trust me and feel safe with me, didn’t I? Lying to you would undo everything we’ve worked so hard to build. I’d rather lose face than lose your confidence.”
Never did I expect the traumatic past of our beloved bottle-blond sunshine captain Jeremy, but somehow, I don't think it could have been more fitting to see how this beautiful boy keeps his pain locked away by his blinding smile. 🌞😟 Just when I think Nora could not surprise me further, she twists the knife deeper. Even now, I don't think we got enough of him, the complexity of his situation - the vitriol he is privy to, the slurs and the rage he has to bury deep, the resentment and guilt crushing him, the shame and sadness - it's so wrong and heartbreaking and it just surprised me. 💔💔 There are still layers and truths to him that he hasn't revealed, buried still for how much blame he carries, and if Jean can find it in him that he deserves to be happy, then can he be the one to show Jeremy that he deserves to be happy and forgive himself? 😔
“You are my partner. My success is your success; your failure is my failure. Do not ever backslide, Jeremy. I will not forgive you.”
“I’d rather die than ever be that person again. Believe me.”
“You are you,” Jean said, simple and unhesitating. “I believe you.”
Her writing makes slow-burns feel seen. There is a palpable want screaming between both Jean and Jeremy - a complicated mess that 'couldn’t make the first move here no matter how desperately he wanted to', both too knowing that it is not something that can be theirs - with reasons so very valid that I can't help but agree and cheer on the slow burn, because it tastes so good to see. 🤎🩵 I know that doesn't make a lick of sense, but all the subtle glimpses of heated exchange or just that quite intimate way of understanding and caring has me choked up and screaming for more, but respecting why we have to wait. *sighs* It's the devil in the details that the jealousy or the desire creeps forth - the resistance, but still yearning has me in their clutches. It's a torturous climb, but I drank every instance of it. The fireworks, the back-to-back exchanges, the tender touches, the glances when they don't think the other is looking... 🥹🥹
“Perhaps I should be. But I will choose you every time. You, and Cat, and Laila, every time. I will lose them all if I must.”
It feels like not much time passed, nor much happened, but it's a slow process that still had enough of a fair development to have me in its clutches. Interactions never expected, words exchanged never thought possible - and yet, it stole the show. IYKYK. 😢 Tore my heart - broke me down - leaving me wanting - needing more. A precious character so tragically taken too soon, but replaced with one that brought such warmth and happiness that if anything happens now, I'd think Nora is just out to hurt us. 😣 The Trojans - a team of all talent and no intelligence - don't have the same vibe as the Foxes - which is fair, but aside from Cat and Laila, I don't see them growing on me quite just yet.
But the Foxes - man, the Foxes.... Lots of thoughts on Kevin, but postcards. Postcards and I'll leave it just at that. 💘🖼️ The game vs the Ravens --- Nora, I beseech you - please give us a snippet from anyone's POV at the Game. 🥺 I'll even take Wymack's if we can't get Andreil's, but I need something to soothe the beast within me. 👉🏻👈🏻 The power of the fandom is still so very alive that I felt such a deep sense of gratitude and satisfaction to see it trending once again. I feel like such a proud mama bear when I saw it - brief, but golden. 🌟🥹
-
reread: 5 stars it is 💘
wowieeee jean's development!!! so proud of him!!! 🥹 now it's jeremy's turn smh.
---------------------
edit: i bought it LETS GO
edit: ok not the author saying "i might have lied about 2 being happier than 1" on x??? 😰😫🙏
need this book like i need air -
22 february 2025: first read (of many)
actual rating: 5+ stars
I am not sorry. Perhaps I should be. But I will choose you every time. You, and Cat, and Laila, every time. I will lose them all if I must.
i simultaneously need to not see this book for 5-7 business days and also reread it immediately. any attempt at a review will have to wait until the next read, but i do have to say that i loved seeing more of the trojans and jeremy’s pov.
pre-read count of how many times i read tsc while waiting for this book to be out: 4
pre-read update: WE ARE GETTING A THIRD JEREJEAN BOOK HELLO I AM ALIVE AGAIN -
It was fine. My least favorite of the series. It felt long, repetitive, and meandering but I still enjoy Jean and Jeremy as characters. I just wish those characters weren’t completely unchanging for this entire book.
Entirely too much info dumping and telling. I would have enjoyed this much more if there was any semblance of a plot beyond random interjections of Raven characters to abuse Jean or the Foxes. Additionally, while I see the temptation in delaying Jeremy’s backstory for the reader, its reveal was in no way satisfying or well-written enough to serve as payoff for its 500+ page buildup. I fail to see the point of creating a traumatic backstory for Jeremy only to fail to use it beyond the repetitive “I don’t want to talk about my family” line. Jeremy is never forced to confront his past or change.
The endless circular pointless conversations were also frustrating. So was the endless “XX goes to the kitchen. XX sits down. Now XXX goes to kitchen and then they sit down.” I think around 75 pages could have been cut from the book and made no difference.
In the end, I knew this wasn’t going to be very well written or realistic after reading the first four and it was only 0.99 so I’m not going to grade on the level of a “real” published novel. Also, I really wished Jean and Jeremy kissed and that kept me going through most of this. -
can't even pretend to be eloquent or reflective right now because it's 12:44am and i've been reading since 8am and all i can think about is the moment during chapter nineteen when i had to pace my apartment yelling, "IS THIS HOW PEOPLE FEEL ABOUT SPORTS????"
click for my spotify playlist💛🌻🧢