| Title | : | Banished Knowledge: Facing Childhood Injuries |
| Author | : | |
| Rating | : | |
| ISBN | : | 0385267622 |
| ISBN-10 | : | 9780385267625 |
| Language | : | English |
| Format Type | : | Paperback |
| Number of Pages | : | 192 |
| Publication | : | First published January 1, 1988 |
Banished Knowledge: Facing Childhood Injuries Reviews
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If anyone needs me, I'll be walking the earth, reading this book into a megaphone.
Sadly, not much has changed: the myth of the "wicked" child, the child-as-property mindset, the taboo on interfering...All of it. -
In her previous (excellent) book, THE DRAMA OF THE GIFTED CHILD, Alice Miller still wrote from a psychoanalytic frame of reference. Now she has abandoned that model of therapy, believing that it only further instills in the client a repression of feeling memory.
Everyone who thinks that s/he might be a parent should read this.
Just wait until you read her observation about Santa Claus! What a revelation!
From BANISHED KNOWLEDGE...
"Every child depends on others for the satisfaction of his needs because he cannot look after himself.... The only possible recourse a baby has when his screams are ignored is to repress his distress, which is tantamount to mutilating his soul, for the result is an interference with his ability to feel, to be aware, and to remember."
"Many people still have no idea that they are placing dynamite in our world when they abuse their children physically or even 'only' psychically. They describe their actions as proper and necessary."
"Not to take one's own suffering seriously, to make light of it or even laugh at it, is considered good manners in our culture. This attitude is even called a virtue, and many people are proud of their lack of sensitivity toward their own fate and above all toward their own childhood."
"Philosophers and other intellectuals have fashioned numerous ways of keeping pain at a distance with the aid of thoughts and of disregarding the realities of life with the aid of an ostensibly befining language."
Well-written: 3; Kept attention: 3. -
If I'd read this book a year ago, I'd have given it 5 stars for its take-no-prisoners approach to condemning abusive parenting practices.
Miller shines a merciless spotlight on what's 'wrong' with many of the fundamental assumptions that many parents make when it comes to dealing with their children, and clearly shows how much deep, lasting damage can be done in the name of 'teaching lessons' and 'discipline'.
Miller's motto is: the child is always right!
In the past, I would have agreed 100%. Now, I have a slightly different view: the child is always good!
Which sounds like semantics, but actually makes all the difference in the world, because even abusive parents were once children, and reminding them of their innate goodness (instead of just condemning the cruel characters they've become) is the key to really healing the problem.
So still a great, if harsh book to read by a former psychoanalyst, that does a very good job of describing the basic problem, but falls short in terms of finding a truly acceptable solution. -
This book changed my life. It helped me begin to face the depth of my childhood pain.
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Alice Miller's thinking is hard to find all in one book, but this is a good starting place. Read as many as you need to to learn how the attitude toward and treatment of children effects the individual and entire societies.
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Alice Miller remains a legend to me, and I intend to read all her books. Her relentless defense of the feelings of the child against cruelty, abuse, and insensitivity is not just intellectually important, but her style conveys a profound spirit of empathy and courage. If I find shortcomings, they might be in myself and my process, but the righteous indignation and the excessive focus on societal problems, rather than personal healing processes, leave some of her books, this included, less therapeutic than I had wished. I picked up this book particularly hoping that it would focus more on the personal process of facing childhood injuries. The book contains her process of finding what worked for her, and a bit on what readers can take away, but I certainly did not find the small portion at the end of this book a sufficient guide for this work. Like many of her books from this era, it directs the reader towards Konrad Stettenbacher, whose short book Making Meaning of Suffering, I found excessively scientific and clinical in tone, and the self-help steps concise to a fault. Fortunately, the field of psychotherapy has changed a lot since Miller's time and there's a lot more work done on how to heal traumatic wounds. Nonetheless, much of that work miss Miller's emotional depth and power. I would suggest readers look into Peter Levine in conjunction with Miller; I find his approach similar but vastly superior to Stettenbacher, and his shortcomings match Miller's strengths well, and vise versa. Hopefully someday, we will have a book which can do it all, but for now, I don't know of one.
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Αν παραβλέψει κάνεις την άκρατη αυτοαναφορικότητα της Μίλλερ, το οτι υποστηρίζει τα συμπεράσματα της με ελάχιστα επιχειρήματα τεκμηρίωσης (υποβαθμίζοντας τα έτσι στο να εκλαμβάνονται τις περισσότερες φορές ως σωστά και αξιόλογα με διαισθητικό μόνο τρόπο από τη μεριά του αναγνώστη) καθώς και τον φαύλο κύκλο στον οποίο συνεχώς πέφτει και πάει ως εξής: οι ενήλικοι πρέπει να πάψουν να απωθούν την κακοποίηση που δέχτηκαν ως παιδιά και όποιος ενήλικος δεν συμμερίζεται τα συμπεράσματα της απωθεί αυτή την κακοποίηση (έτσι ώστε ακόμα και η άρνηση των θεωριών της να τις επιβεβαιώνει, ένα επιχείρημα στο οποίο επαναπαυεται πολλές φορές) – πρόκειται για ένα ανατρεπτικό βιβλίο που αγγίζει ένα πολύ ευαίσθητο και πολύ σοβαρό θέμα με σοβαρότητα και επιμονή, με στόχο να προστατεύσει τα παιδιά, ανοίγοντας τα μάτια των ενηλίκων απέναντι στον πόνο που και οι ίδιοι ένιωσαν σαν παιδιά και με τελικό σκοπό την έξοδο από μια αυτοτροφοδοτουμενη διαδικασία που αναπαράγει την κακοποίηση και τελικά μας ζημιώνει όλους μας.
Άξια επίσης η όλη ιδέα ότι δεν αποτελεί αμαρτία το να κατηγορήσει κανείς τους γονείς του για τα δεινά που μπορεί να υπέστη εξαιτίας τους. -
If you’ve had a bad childhood, read this book. If you’ve had a good childhood, read this book. If you aren’t quite sure about your childhood and want to embark on a search for answers and meaning in your life, you really need to read this book. And if you care about the welfare of a child’s mind, read this book.
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It was such a refreshing experience, to know that I wasn't being paranoid when I thought from time to that that society would do anything to refrain from blaming the parent. I'm not shy about my abusive parents in any way, I always try to voice my feelings and experiences so that people know that they are not alone, like I used to think. But always, always there are people who say "You should be ashamed of yourself! Your parents gave you life! They fed you and you dare to blame them?! Shame!" I always thought that it was something about Turkish culture but Miller says it's a worldwide habit.
It made my eyes water, when she explained how people refrain from blaming the actual responsible one. When you kill someone, you are a murderer. When you steal, you are thief. But when you abuse and traumatise your own children, you are suddenly off the hook. You can't be blamed. The ultimate blame is always seen on the wicked child.
Banished Knowledge, you were a godsend book and made me question my own parents' parents to see why they raised me like this. Thank you Alice Miller. For showing the courage on putting the blame where it belongs. -
This was so amazing that I had to re-read several chapters and went back for more...so incrediblely important.
Please read this...you owe yourself and your children the knowledge presented between the covers of what Alice Miller has to say.
I'm moved beyond words and can't digest all of it...going back for more. Let the ramifications of this banished knowledge sink into my phychie and absorb the consequences of denial that has put our children in danger.
Totally life-changing...I must study this deeper! -
I can’t say how much her books have helped me understand the effects of childhood abuse has had on me. I have struggled with depression and anxiety for most of my life due to this. Her words make a lot of sense to why I am how I am today. At 40 years old, I am only just beginning to work through the repressed childhood memories of my abuse and with the insight provided by her books, I hope to find the work I need to do less painful.
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Think I need to re-read this one. I remember thinking it was important and thought-provoking.
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been a long time but I recall this book in particular was excellent
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Wow. Leaves a lot to think about. Don't reject or accept this on its face. Really engage. I imagine I'll be doing so for years.
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This book changed my life- literally. My eyes were opened wide to the effects of childhood trauma and I was able to go deeper into my own healing work- many many years ago!
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Another excellent Book from Alice Miller
Highly recommend reading for parents and people who are struggling with their childhood memories. One of the often heard things is when someone realizes that they are acting exactly like their Parents in a way that they originally condemned. This is the book for you. In fact all Alice Miller's writings would be of great benefit. It addresses a child's need to forget what their Parents did to them that scared them, was unjust, was even abusive as they were dependent on them for survival. This forgetting doesn't go away after adulthood is reached but remains like a program running in the background until you have children. This book is valuable in changing the future of our species if enough people choose to deal with this repressed programing. My two favorite books by Alice Miller are "For Your Own Good" which eirely used the exact words my Father used, and "Thou Shalt Not Be Aware". -
This is a wonderful book. However, I wouldn’t say that every parents-to-be must read this book, because I know some people read the book and will still come to terms of abusing their child. Simply because there are parents that never repress their pain from their own parents, but telling the painful experience to their children. On one hand, they say: I will never beat you because I knew how painful to a child it is, on the other hand, they lock the child up in an attic. When questioned, they still tell the child, see? I never beat you.
Above example is exactly Alice Miller showed in Eugène’s play, where lying mother denying the realities of her son, driving him crazy.
☹️ -
In this book Miller redifines her previous theories, based on other psychoanalysists, and produces her own ideas. She also looks back on her previous book "The Drama of the Gifted Child" and corrects her thoughts, implying she now understands more. This book is an argument in solving. It is short so a perfect quick read as an introduction to the depths of the unconcious, and to her theories in general. I only give it three stars because it is a lot of information that has previously been stated in her other books, and can be repetitive.
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Alice Miller should be required reading for the entire human species.
This book is fantastic, but not the place to start. Drama of the Gifted Child, For Your Own Good, and Thou Shalt Not be Aware are all better launching points into her work.
But this book is still wonderful in its own right. -
A straightforward essay that focuses on the concept of child abuse, and how often society disregards its impact on the devolopment of a personality, leading to the perpetuation of violence in childrearing for generations.
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I am glad that I suddenly decided to read this book. reading such harsh reality of my childhood was bothering me but it also baught me a great sense of relief. I know now I can break my patterns and I know the reason of all my negativity. I loved this book. it's a good read for everyone.
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The journey towards greater understanding can be inconvenient sometimes, even distressing. Alice Miller's work challenges our most treasured mythology, which can make for uncomfortable reading, but also makes an important contribution towards understanding why we are how we are.
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Brilliant, as usual.
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As usual, Alice Miller and her eyes opening view. So grateful that i found her books and get enlightened.
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Άλλο ένα υπέροχο βιβλίο από την Alice Miller! Το προτείνω ανεπιφύλακτα! Το οφείλουμε στο παιδί μέσα μας να βρούμε το χαμένο μας εαυτό και να προστατευσουμε από την κακοποίηση και τις επόμενες γενιές.
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Moins bien construit que les précédents : pas dintro ni de conclusion, une suite de différents cas mais toujours juste et instructif.
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Miller's very convincing case about childhood insults suffered by far too many is a book I recommend to anyone considering parenthood as well as all those who already are parents.
